Predictive Text


Predictive text makes me want to break stuff. And when activated on a touch screen, there is no limit to what can go wrong.

This evening I told my bestie that she needs to move back home so that we can see each other all the urine. All the urine? WTF?

And every time I go for dinner in Westville, my babysitter hears I’m heading to Nashville. Yeah, cause that Taylor Swift needs all the competition she can get!

Then there was the time I was sending a friend my famous brownie recipe and told her she would need eggs, flour and Mike. Mike? really. What kind of brownies are these… tall, dark and naked???

Another favourite is when I said “I’ll see you in web minutes”.  Apparently I, unlike everyone else out there, operate on Spiderman time.

Sent the hubby a romantic text… “You are my one and oyster.” Um…….

Predictive touch screen text can literally destroy relationships, be warned.

After a few glasses of wine, I was trying to compliment a recently divorced special lady who was feeling a bit down and doubting her ability to snare a new man, let alone one who would be good to her kids. I told her she was looking sexy and would find another……. She never responded. Turns out what I really said was: You’re looking sixty, you’ll find neither.

My friend got really sick once and she messaged me all about how awful she was feeling. I sent her kisses, except instead of xxx, it read zzz… we’re not really talking anymore.

Unfortunately in todays fast paced world, we rarely have time to check, and re-read every short message we send. But maybe I should. Or send them to my editor for proofreading, because I must be the worlds worst.

And I’m not even going to mention the time I told that woman to suck off…..

Happy Thursday everyone, here’s to gearing down for the weekend!

9 thoughts on “Predictive Text

  1. Bwahahahahahaha predictive text goes hand in hand with sending the message to totally the wrong person! I once sent a romatic message to my mom instead of my hubby by accident! You’ve made my day wahahahahahaha

    1. So it’s not just me, yay! I couldn’t post them because too many were x-rated, but yesterday for a laugh I Googled “predictive text fails”. I’m not even kidding when I say I was literally CRYING with laughter! Do it! xxx

  2. Mine’s not too bad. Told my daughter that I loved her lots and was mildly amused to get a message from my friend telling me that she loved me too (with a big smiley face). Anyone could make that mistake Charne (daughter) ….. Claire (friend).

  3. Brilliant Liss, I love a good predictive text fail!! is a great site/app if you’re ever in need of need of a chuckle! xxx

  4. This was hilarious, loving your sense of humour. Keep these posts coming. Perhaps you should just write a book on the daily events in your life, it would probably be a best seller!

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